Because I’m sort of in a music rut and because we all love to get mail.

Important:  Any and all Black-Eyed Peas songs are prohibited in this swap. I’m in charge around here.  Thanks.

Anyway, if you want to get in on this, here’s what to do:

Email me with your name, address, and blog url by next Friday (May 28th).

Once I get everyone’s info, I’ll send you 5 random people who you have to make a mix for.  You can do this however you want; personalize them individually, or make the same mix for all 5 people.  Just make it good and have fun with it!

Try to send them out asap once you get your 5 names so we can all start getting in on some sweet tunes, and hopefully blogging about them!

So that’s it.  Now get to work, people!

PS do you call them “mix CD’s” or “mixED CD’s”?  If you call them anything to do with tapes, don’t talk to me.   I don’t care that they were originally tapes, it’s 2010.  Get a hobby.

Hahaha.  I’m a poet and I don’t even know it!  HEEEEE heeee!

Anyway, I finally made dinner for the fam last night.  I’ve only been wanting to get into cooking for, ohhh the last MONTH.

Since I’m new at this, I went with something easy: Caribbean Sweet Potato Bean Stew, made in the Crock Pot!  Or slow cooker, if you’re not as cool as I am.

In not so many pictures:

all the ingredients together

everything in the pot before I turned it on

I don’t have a picture of the final product, which I feel really bad about.  I was too starved to worry about pictures at a time like dinner though.  Trust me, this stuff was goooooood.

You can make it if you want.  It was way easy.

Caribbean Sweet Potato Bean Stew

Literally, you throw everything in there, give it a stir, and turn the Crock Pot on low for 5-6 hours.  That’s it!  I recommend closer to 5 hours though, because I did 6 and the sweet potatoes were a little too mushy, almost to the point of falling apart when I put it on the plate.  I also didn’t add the almonds or put hot sauce on it…there was enough kick.

This stuff was bangin’.  Yay, I can cook!

Goodnight.

*PROFANITY is key here.  If you are NOT a fan of the letters U, K, F, and C strung together to form a specific word, don’t continue.   Or, continue, but don’t mad at me.  I happen to love bad words a whole lot, and if you do too check out:

What The Fuck Should I Make For Dinner?

Click on what it tells you to make and it redirects you to a non-profane website with the recipe.  Or get them to give you a different fucking idea.  How perfect is this for me??

This. Is. Absurd. LL Cool J does arm curls with those wackjobs from The View. Elisabeth Hasselbeck uses this as an opportunity to remind everyone that she is the lightest co-host on that disaster of a talk show. And LL, WTF is that hat you’re wearing??

I can’t stop watching this.

It’s the perfect song for a summer Friday.  I should have posted it earlier, but I’m only 1/3 of the way through today’s cup of coffee so…

Lots of hype these days over The Morning Benders.  Big Echo came out a couple months ago and was co-produced by Grizzly Bear’s bassist.  Hey-o!  This jam “Promises” is mad-summery to me for some reason (even though this particular single was released in January).  Loud drums and vocals, but still mellow enough to help me transition from asleep to awake at 7:30 am.  Plus I love the album cover art and may be heading over to my local thrift store today to pick myself up a one-piece bathing suit and yellow rubber bathing cap.

Listen to “Promises” while you get ready for the weekend.  Play it while you’re having a cookout or bonfire.  Then invite me to said cookout or bonfire.  I’ll bring the music.

Happy Friday!

Not that Big “O.”  Sickos.

Just another article on adult kids moving back in with their parents.  It’s a long-ass article, but it’s from Oprah(!), so you HAVE to read it.  More of a guide-ish thing for the adults and the…semi-adults, but it definitely gave me a little perspective that I may have lost within the past few months.  I definitely don’t endorse all of it though, which you’ll see if you read it here.  Still, worth the read.

Parents, I’m Home! Why More Adult Children Are Moving In with Mom and Dad

Oprah.com

Job losses, mounting student loans and high costs of living—how can young adults get ahead in life? According to new research studies, more adult children are heading home sweet home to Mom and Dad during the recession.

As economic times get more difficult for all Americans, the recession is no doubt leaving its mark on young adults trying to build lives for themselves. A survey conducted in October 2009 by the Pew Research Center found that about one in 10 adults ages 18 to 34 are moving back in with their parents because of the state of the economy.

Because this living situation can get tricky fast, it’s important that, as a parent of what social scientists call a boomerang child, you work with your grown child to help get her back on her feet. Susan Morris Shaffer and Linda Perlman Gordon, co-authors of Mom, Can I Move Back in with You?, offer advice to help make the living situation as pain-free as possible. Plus, they share ways you can help your child grow.

Prior to an adult child’s return, it’s important to make sure you are communicating your needs with your child. Discuss both your expectations and responsibilities and your child’s, Shaffer says. “Really negotiate collaboratively—don’t tell your kid the way in which you want him or her to behave,” she says. “[The situation] really has to be very purposeful, but also enjoyable for both adult children and their parents.”

Also, work out any kinks in your parent-child relationship before you once again share the same address. “If the relationship has some baggage, which, if you’re raising teenagers, it’s hard not to have baggage, you have to understand that it’s not going to be slipped under the rug,” Shaffer says.

How the living situation affects Mom and Dad

Seriously though, where’s MY handbook for moving back home? WTF?

When an adult child moves home and you were an empty nester, you might be upset about your loss of privacy. But you need to stay optimistic and make the most of your living situation. “Look at it as a new opportunity to spend time with your adult children when you don’t have the angst of living with teenagers,” Shaffer says.

“Understand that you have an emerging adult living with you, not the teenager who left before college,” Gordon adds.

But what is your role as a parent in this living arrangement? It’s to support your child as she becomes incrementally more mature and help her better manage her own life, Shaffer says. “Make sure you’re not enabling further dependence, but giving them real opportunities and coaching and mentoring them to become mature adults,” she says.

It might seem difficult to gauge an adult child’s growth, but Shaffer and Gordon have developed a new standard for measuring maturity that’s more applicable for today’s young adults.

Some signs of maturity include your adult child’s ability to:

• Display empathy
• Have opportunities to show personal responsibility and demonstrate personal responsibility
• Become as financially independent as possible
• Set and maintain appropriate boundaries, set her own course and show respect for others’ privacy
• Develop respectful interdependence. “We want to stay connected to our children, but we want them to become independent and become individuals while staying connected,” Shaffer says.

When you see your boomerang child failing to meet these emotional standards, it can be difficult not to step in. However, Shaffer says to rescue with caution. “Don’t do for them what they can do for themselves, and listen before responding to them,” she says. “Realize that making things easier for them doesn’t not necessarily prepare them for real life.”

Also, allowing your adult child to fix her own mistakes shows her that you have total faith in her. “If you’re constantly fixing things, that erodes their self-esteem,” Shaffer says.

What living at home means for an adult child

According to the Pew Research Center’s study, the current economic state is not only forcing some young adults to move back home, it’s also forcing them to put their lives on hold. Fifteen percent of single adults younger than 35 said they have postponed getting married because of the recession. In addition, 14 percent of all young adults have delayed having a child because of their financial situation.

But Gordon suggests that young adults have been putting their lives on hold before the recession began. “If you look at the age that girls and boys are getting married, it’s substantially up compared to their parents,” Gordon says. “It is taking longer to launch. It really does take more money to be able to put a roof over your head, an apartment and sustain yourself, and more people are waiting so they can be more economically solvent.”

Another factor is that more young women are working and pursuing their own careers. “It’s not just boys out there looking to make their way in the world—you’ve got girls pursuing their lives beyond wanting to become mothers and homemakers,” she says.

It’s also important to note that it’s more difficult to stay at one job for an extended period of time. “Before, there were many job shifts that 20-year-olds had,” Gordon says. “You can’t expect to retire in 50 years with a gold watch anymore. There’s way more mobility.”

Not only has the career landscape changed, but when your adult child moves back home, her personal life changes as well, Gordon says. Certain issues, like going out at night and having relationships, can be difficult for a young adult she’s under your roof, but the most important thing is for you and your child to maintain respect for one another. “While your 20-something might have much more of a night life than you have, you expect that kid to come home and not make noise when you have to get up in the morning,” Gordon says. “It’s the same kind of respect that you would give a roommate. So there are all kinds of mutuality and interdependence that have to be spelled out and clear when your child moves back home.”

But when you disagree with your adult child’s lifestyle, it’s important to deal with these issues as they happen and not to bottle them up. “You can sustain a certain amount an acceptance of something if you only see it three times a year,” Shaffer says. “It’s very different when you’re dealing with something on a daily basis. Then you can’t be disingenuous. Rage, aggravation, disappointment—all of those emotions are going to come out.”

Ways to help your adult child grow

While an adult child is living at home, you should give her opportunities to become more responsible and develop the skill set she needs to be able to manage her own life. So does that mean it’s okay for you to charge your adult child rent? “There are lots of different ways to contribute to the household,” Shaffer says. “Paying rent is only one of them.” She suggests activities such as helping out with younger siblings or grandparents, doing the grocery shopping or making dinner as other ways your adult child can be valuable.

Another way you can help your child save money is by having the young adult give money to you to put it away for her. [Jillian says: Hahaha what?  Nice try, but no thanks. ] Perhaps you can help her restructure her debts. “The most important thing is that you insist on children taking on responsibilities,” Shaffer says.

Instead of picking your child up after she stumbles, try to step back. Gordon explains that when her 20-something children moved back home, she understood that she had to let them make their own mistakes. “We didn’t have to save them anymore,” she says. “We knew they better learn the consequences because later it would be way worse. Our perspective was that we knew it was another shot at parenting from afar and parenting by doing less rather than doing more. It was an absolute joy.”

Definitely.

So since being unemployed, I’ve started to play a little game with myself.  I don’t have a sweet title for this game yet, but the idea is to see how long you can go without spending ANY money (other than bills and that sort of thing).  It’s all a completely mental thing that helps you conserve.  Genius, right?  Don’t spend money now and you’ll have it for later.  Who knew???

Anyway, this game has led me to put off grocery shopping for as long as humanly possible.  Yes, I live at home with my parents but I pay for my own groceries.  It’s only fair, and we don’t really eat the same things anyway.

So I wanted a veggie burger sandwich, but ran out of bread (the bread in the picture is bogus and not mine).  Rummaging through the freezer, I noticed these waffles (see above), and an idea was born.  A waffle sandwich!  Again, I’m a genius.  Don’t be jealous.

NutriGrain whole wheat Eggos are literally the best thing ever.  No really, they are.  Trust.

Speaking of the best things ever, if you have a Genaurdi’s/Safeway near you, go buy these Eating Right (haha) veggie burgers.  Eating Right is their store brand of “healthy” food, and they generally miss the mark with the nonsense they come up with, but not here.  Make sure to get the ones with whole grains (brown rice and oats; SCORE!), mushrooms, and cheddar cheese.  So good and so cheap.

The finished product:

I know you’re thinking, that’s a crap ton of Romain for that small of a sandwich.  Guess what?  There were like 3 bags of Romain in the fridge too so I had to use ‘em.  Also, a giant bag of carrots, so I used 2 whole ones for the side.  So awesomely bootleg.

If you do ever decide to make a sandwich with waffles, give them a least two sessions in the toaster.  I learned that the hard way.  I threw a little salt on them too so they would hopefully taste less like breakfast and more like lunch, even though I’m extremely adverse to adding extra salt to anything.  Just go easy.

Oh,  and don’t buy waffles specifically for making sandwiches if you’re trying not to spend money.  It only works if you’re out of bread completely and have no other options.  Otherwise, you’re wasting money because regular bread is cheaper.  How am I so freakin’ smart??

What other cheap meals can you come up with using whatever you have lying around the kitchen? You tell me, and I’ll make it.  Sorry, no tomatoes allowed.  No meat either.  Blehhh.